Monday, July 23, 2007
I won't be crying in the next few minutes, while I wish you goodbye and farewell. Some people may struggle with the number 30 but not I. Not a bit.
Sometimes you felt like a tornado. A grey cloud that I could not leave, peeking out of and seeing the blue skies, knowing the storm would be over at some point. There was a lot of grief, stagnancy, denial. Then there was a lot of release, growth, messy change as I prepared to leave all that behind. Preparing for what is now to come.
Other times it was like being born. Like falling in love for the first time, knee deep in a river. Letting the muse run through me and writing songs. Performing my songs on stage. Some delicious friendships were born in your time. Many of them will be carried on, hopefully for the rest of my time on this earth. I found a friend in myself and learned to enjoy her company again.
I feel like I am walking into the next phase in my life with eyes wide open, taking deep breaths. I'm not romanticizing this whole growing up thing. I'm just ready for it. ready to make better choices. ready to not stress so much about them. ready to be loved in the ways that i am worthy of. ready to laugh more at my mistakes.
its now 11:59.....
happy birthday to me
and to harmony!