Monday, August 15, 2005

I am making this change for Me.

In 13 days I am moving away from this city.
I've been here for 5 years.
It feels strange because everything around me feels like home. I am truly blessed by the friends I have made in victoria. I have watched friends go through transitions, both physically and emotionally. I have watched everyone hook up, breakup, make up. I have had love here, I have had wonderful solitude. I have lost and rediscovered here. But sometimes comfort isn't enough to make you stay.

Victoria and I are like one of those relationships though, that you have been in for a long time, to the point that you are just comfortable, not necessarily in love anymore, but truly enjoy going through the daily patterns. But I need more than that. I don't know if vancouver will provide that re-invigorated love, but I know this for sure.

I am making this change for Me.

I can't stay here because it is lovely. It may make me miss it more. I am not running away. Not in the least. and that feels good. I often put others needs before mine and I have been working on taking steps to change this over the past few years, little did I know it would lead me to such a big one.

I was at a gathering tonight with people I have known for years, making new connections. Seeing lovelies that I wish I knew better. It was getting late and my ciders were treating me nicely. I walked away and looked back at the circle of punks, hippies, bois, and crazies I call my kin and understood why it is okay for me to leave them, tonight and in 13 days.
Cause I get to leave while the night is still young but late enough to know the reasons to leave.
Blow this city a kiss and walk away while everything still tastes sweet.

1 comment:

beth said...

mmm... thanks for all the fun. I'll miss you. :)